WopBot Enterprises, Inc., is a Manhattan, NY based holding company focusing primarily on technology and new media ventures. With a market capitalization of $550 million USD based solely on what is in the trust fund of one of the Combustible Dork writers, our goal is to make the world a better place for ourselves while fucking over everyone else in the process.
Below is a short, but growing list of the Fortune 500 hopeful ventures that we have significant holdings of:
Combustible Dork: A new media website full of problematic jokes and fake news for teenage boys, incels, and those who grew up reading the complete unabridged works of Maddox. We are anticipating record profits from The New York Times Bestseller, The Comedians Manifesto, written by our very own Carlos “The WopBot” Danger after being called utter garbage by Oprah Winfrey.
Millennial Porn Group, LLC: A joint venture with MindGeek, the company behind PornHub, Millennial Porn is a 21st century adult entertainment website by millennials for millennials with adult videos you can enjoy with your whole family.
Fyre 51: Launched in 2019, Fyre 51 is a yearly multi-day music festival held at historic Area 51 in Nevada with performances from acts known worldwide. We are hoping to make Fyre 51 a bigger success over the coming years. Contact our team at email@example.com if you wish to be a part of this years festival.
Worthless Coin Investments, Limited: Acquired by WopBot Enterprises, Inc. in 2019, Worthless Coin is a growing cryptocurrency investment website with over 20 million active investors and a decade in the cryptocurrency industry. WopBot Enterprises, Inc. will be offering an ICO through our Worthless Coin subsidiary in the coming months.
Danger Medical Group, Corp.: Co-founders Mark and Tony Blunt started Wild West Weed, Corp. in 2015 in Salt Lake City, Colorado. When they realized that they needed additional capital to rebrand in order to realize their dream of being the number one medical and adult-use jazz cabbage producer in North America we were who they called. Now they have thousands of street pharmacists and are on track to move from number two to the coveted number one position by the end of 2020.
The High Writer: this is a guy we pay to just blog while he’s high.